


you make me feel

by yasi



Category: EastEnders (TV)
Genre: M/M, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-03 22:27:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 6,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24893143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasi/pseuds/yasi
Summary: a collection of filled ballum prompts.
Relationships: Callum "Halfway" Highway/Ben Mitchell
Comments: 64
Kudos: 125





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> prompt: “You didn’t tell me your friend was cute! Now what am I going to do?”

“Where are you taking me, Lo?” 

“To the Albert. I’m sick of seeing your moping face every day so you’re gonna buy me a pint. And to make it up to me, we’re hanging out with my new friend.” Lola beams at him. 

Ben had been wallowing in self pity for a couple weeks now. His boyfriend had just broken up with him, having met someone else. Ben’s world had broken apart and nothing and no-one had been able to cheer him up. His mum had given up trying to get him out of his bedroom, glad he at least went to school. 

Lola had been another matter. She’d let him mope around for a while until she'd barged into his room, pulled him out of his bed and told him to go get changed. She’d be waiting downstairs for him. Ben would’ve rather stayed at home but he’d once seen Lola knock a guy out for calling her shorty, so he didn’t fancy taking his chances telling her no. 

He’d half-heartedly put on some fresh clothes and gone downstairs. Lola had smiled at him and pulled him outside. His mum had stood by the door, tears in her eyes. 

“Noooo, no new people,” Ben whines. “I’m not in the mood to make idle chitchat. I’m heartbroken, Lo!” 

“Yeah and my mind is gonna break if I have to listen to you go on about your stupid ex. Get over it!”

“He was the love of my life, Lo! I can’t just get over him.” 

“Ben! Stop being dramatic! Every one of your ex’s was the love of your life. How long did is last this time? Four, five weeks?” she asks, looking at him questioningly.

“Five weeks, four days, eleven hours. It was the best time of my life!” 

“Yadda, yadda! Paul isn’t gonna come back to you, he has a new boyfriend. And we’re gonna get pissed.” Lola tells Ben and pulls him into the Albert. She stops for a moment and scans the room. When she finds who she’s looking for, her face lights up and she waves happily. Ben follows her gaze and freezes. 

Waving just as happily back at her is a tall guy. He has a beautiful face, with a bright smile and ears that stick out a bit. Ben is enchanted. 

“You didn’t tell me your friend was cute! Now what am I going to do?” Ben murmurs, trying to flatten his clothes, but giving up soon.

“Had I known Callum would do the trick, I’d’ve introduced you to him much sooner,” Lola grins up at him.

“Why didn’t you?” Ben asks, barely looking at Lola. He can’t keep his eyes off Callum. He’s gorgeous.

“Because I stupidly believed you when you said Paul was the love of your life.

“Who?” Ben asks, finally turning to Lola. She just shakes her head at him and turns to Callum.

“Hi, Cal! Did you wait long?” They hug each other.

“Nah, just got here.” He turns to Ben, looking from him to Lola.

“Callum, this is my friend Ben. The one I told you about,” she says and grins at him.

“She told you about me?” Ben asks, raising his eyebrows. “All good, I hope?”

“Good enough,” Callum tells him and winks at Ben with both eyes. Ben throws his head back and laughs, charmed despite himself.

“Too much?” Callum asks, ducking his head. He looks embarrassed. Now Ben is even more charmed.

“Nope, you’re doing well.” Ben smiles at him. He then remembers Lola and turns to her.

“You joining us?” he asks her.

“Of course! You owe me at least one drink!” She links arms with both of them and steers them to a corner table. They spent the day at the Albert, talking and laughing. But mostly drinking.

One year on, Ben and Callum are still dating.


	2. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: The one stumbling to the other’s front door after getting hurt/beaten up etc. + “I thought you said no more dangerous stunts?”

“I thought you said no more dangerous stunts?” Ben sighs and helps Callum into the flat, kicking the door shut with his foot. 

“How else am I supposed to impress you?” Callum mumbles, blood trickling from his mouth. 

“This is no time to joke, you idiot!” Ben deposits Callum onto the sofa and rushes into the kitchen to get the first aid kit. It’s not the first time they’ve done this. 

“Would you believe me if I told you it wasn’t my fault?” Callum asks, trying to sit up.

“Not a chance! I know you too well, remember?” Ben rolls his eyes and helps Callum. He puts a couple cushions behind his back to steady him. “Now, tell me where it hurts.” He sits down on the table in front of Callum.

“Everywhere?” Callum’s right eye is a mess of black and blue, already swelling up. 

“Come on, Callum.” Ben sighs. “I can’t help you if I don’t know where you’re hurt.” 

“Yeah,” Callum agrees quietly. “It’s mostly my face and my hands. But my ribs-” He tries to show Ben but breaks off abruptly, groaning in pain.

“Okay, okay! Stop moving.” Ben hates seeing Callum like this. He doesn’t understand why Callum does this to himself. Slowly Ben helps him out of his jumper, apologising softly whenever Callum groans in pain. 

When Callum’s finally rid of his jumper, Ben examines his ribs. There is a big bruise and it hurts Callum when he moves too fast, but it doesn’t seem to be broken. Ben sighs in relief.

“Ouch!” Callum complains, while Ben puts on a the dressing. 

“Hold still. This needs to be tight or it won’t heal properly!” Ben admonishes him. When he’s done, he pats Callum’s ribs on purpose, making Callum grimace in pain. 

“Is that how you treat your beloved boyfriend?” Callum asks, trying to downplay his pain.

“It is when he’s being an idiot and gets into fights!” Ben looks down. “You promised me, Cal. No more fights!” He pours a generous amount of disinfectant on a cotton ball and goes to work on Callum’s face carefully. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, but they were slagging you off. And I-”

“You don’t need to fight my battles, Callum,” Ben interrupts him quietly. “I can take care of myself.”

“But you don’t have to! I’m yours and you’re mine! We take care of each other. And sometimes that means punching stupid men.” Ben wants to protest. 

“No, Ben! I’m not gonna sit by while some stuck up fucker prances around and spreads lies about you just because you told him no. Next time he’ll think twice before he slags you off.” 

Ben just looks at him, at his bruised face and he’s overcome with love. He doesn’t know what he did to deserve this man and his big heart. But he’ll do anything to keep Callum in his life. 

“You big idiot!” Ben says fondly. He cups Callum’s face, careful not to hurt him too much and kisses him softly. Callum might be an idiot, but he’s Ben’s idiot and Ben loves him very much.


	3. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: I love you, but I need you to go away because you’re really bloody distracting and I have to pass this test tomorrow.

“Who knew you could be this needy!” Ben laughs at his boyfriend’s antics. 

Callum has his giant form squished on the sofa, though his arms and legs are flailing about. He has his head buried behind too many cushions; he looks ridiculous. And Ben can’t help but laugh at it. 

His patient and calm boyfriend is anything but today. Sure, Ben hasn’t been paying much attention to him these past weeks, too busy with his advanced training course in sales & marketing. But it had been Callum’s idea that Ben do the course. He hadn’t wanted at first but it turned out to be interesting and all Ben has left to do is pass the test and he’ll have his certificate. Callum knows that. 

“Come on, Ben. It’s such a nice day outside and we haven’t done anything together in ages. Let’s just get ice cream and then you can get back to your studying,” Callum begs.

“What about last night? Was that nothing?” Ben asks, grinning at his boyfriend. 

“You know what I mean,” Callum whines. “I want to go out with you, hold your hand and show you off!”

“Can’t. Need to finish this chapter,” Ben says and goes back to his reading. Not too long after Ben hears clothes rustling and looks up. What he sees makes him laugh out loud again, his head thrown back. Callum is taking off his clothes in the middle of the living room.

“Babe, what are you doing?” Ben asks. 

“Making you pay attention to me the only way I can these days?” Callum replies, half asking.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Ben says. He wants to go back to his reading but having a half-naked Callum standing in the middle of his living room is a distracting sight and Ben can’t keep his eyes from him. 

“Fuck, Callum! I love you, but I need you to go away because you’re really bloody distracting and I _have_ to pass this test tomorrow,” Ben tells him desperately. 

But Callum only pouts and looks at him with his big and beautiful eyes. Ben looks at him for a heartbeat and another and then sighs. 

“Fine, you gorgeous menace! Put your clothes back on, we’re going out for ice cream.”

“Yes!” Callum does a little happy dance, looking even more ridiculous because he’s half-naked. Ben shakes his head fondly. 

“But only if you promise to let me study afterwards. Deal?” 

“Deal!” Callum smiles brightly and starts putting his clothes back on.

Ben rolls his eyes, closes his book and watches Callum. After all, Callum _is_ his favourite distraction.


	4. 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: You could never ruin anything.

When Callum gets home it’s to a disaster in his kitchen. The fire alarm is blearing loudly, there is smoke in everywhere and something definitely smells burnt.

“Ben?” he asks loudly into the room. He’s worried, he can’t see Ben anywhere. First things first though, he turns off the fire alarm and opens all windows to get the smoke out of the flat.

“Ben?” he asks again and goes to look for him. Callum finds him in the bedroom, sitting on the floor, his eyes squeezed shut and his hands covering his ears.

“Oh Ben,” Callum murmurs and goes to him. He sits down beside Ben and touches him carefully so as not to scare him. Ben still startles violently but when he sees it’s Callum he throws himself into his arms and buries his head in Callum’s shoulder.

Callum holds on to Ben, trying to calm him down. When Ben finally stops shivering, Callum pulls away and makes Ben look at him.

“What happened?” he asks slowly, so Ben can read his lips.

Ben shrugs and looks away. Callum is having none of it. With his hand on Ben’s chin, he turns Ben’s face to himself.

“What’s going on, Ben?”

“I ruined everything,” Ben mumbles, barely able to look at Callum. Callum just looks at him questioningly, his eyebrows raised. Ben sighs deeply.

“Today is our anniversary and I wanted to surprise you with a home-cooked meal. But the instructions were confusing and the girl in the video never stopped talking and I burnt everything. And then the stupid fire alarm went off and everything became too much.” Ben pushes away from Callum and buries his face in his hands.

Callum’s heart melts at Ben’s words. He studies Ben for a moment and realises that Ben is wearing Callum’s favourite shirt, the grey one that makes his eyes look brighter. He smiles and shakes his head fondly.

Callum pulls Ben’s hands away, cups his face and kisses him softly, feeling Ben’s tension melt away. When they break apart, he holds Ben’s gaze.

“You could never ruin anything,” Callum tells him. “You tried to cook for me. You nearly burnt down the flat, but you tried. It’s the thought that counts. And I don’t need no fancy dinner. All I need is you.”

“Yeah?” Ben asks, smiling slowly.

“Of course, you idiot. I love you, don’t I?” Callum grins brightly.

“I love you, too!”


	5. 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: I can’t imagine my life without you in it. You are so important to me, you are such a big part of my life, that I just…I can’t imagine you not here.

“I can’t imagine my life without you in it. You are so important to me, you are such a big part of my life, that I just…I can’t imagine you not here.”

Callum freezes in the doorway when he registers what Ben is saying. Who is Ben talking to? Lexi is at school, he's just left her at the gates.

Is this Ben… rehearsing a proposal? They've been together for over two years now and they'd tentatively talked about what they both wanted out of their relationship. Ben had said he wasn't ready for marriage yet. Callum had been a little disappointed, but mostly he’d been relieved. He'd rushed into things with Whitney too fast and he doesn't wanna make the same mistake with Ben.

Callum loves Ben, more than anything else in his life and he knows they're each other’s forever. But he doesn't need a piece of paper to prove that. He likes where they are at right now and he'd thought Ben did, too.

Callum doesn't want to disappoint Ben, but he also doesn't wanna lie to Ben. Callum sighs. There is no way out of it, he has to face the music. He braces himself for the coming conversation.

"Ben?" he asks, slowly walking into the flat. Ben is standing in the kitchen, his back turned to Callum. He's still in his pyjamas, not having changed yet.

“Yes?”

"Who were you talking to?" Callum asks and Ben turns around slowly.

"What?" Ben looks like a deer caught in headlights. "I wasn't talking to anyone. Just me here." He smiles awkwardly and shakes his head.

"Ben, I heard you. Where you—" Callum wants to ask about the proposal when he sees Ben holding a cup and stops.

"Tell me that's not what I think it is," Callum asks, mock-angry.

"It's not?" Ben asks, his eyes going wide. "It definitely isn't coffee, Callum." He shakes his head again. Callum closes the distance between them with quick steps and takes the cup from Ben. Without taking his eyes off him, Callum takes a sip. And would you look at that, it is coffee.

"Ben, you promised you wouldn’t drink coffee for three weeks. Have you been sneaking cups every day?” Callum asks. He moves over to the sink to empty the cup. And then stops.

"Wait. Please tell me you weren't talking to the coffee just now before I walked in." Callum turns back to Ben; he’s trying not to laugh.

"I don't know what you mean." Ben makes to go to the bedroom but Callum stops him.

"Just when I got home, it sounded like you were making a love declaration or proposing to someone. Seeing as neither Lexi nor I were here, I was wondering who you were talking to." Callum knows all he has to do is outlast Ben in their staring match and Ben will tell him the truth. And he's right, again.

"Okay, yes, I was talking to the coffee," Ben admits. Callum snorts and rolls his eyes.

"But you have to understand, Callum. I haven't had a coffee in days. My body is yearning for it. I need it. Please, please, let me have a cup of coffee," he begs.

Callum can’t hold it anymore, he bursts into laughter. Ben is ridiculous and Callum wouldn’t want him any other way, but this is too much.

Just when he’s about to calm down, Callum chances a look at Ben and goes off again, laughing hysterically, barely able to stand. Ben is standing with his arms crossed over his chest, pouting.

“Callum! I’m in agony here!” Ben insists, stomping his foot, making Callum laugh even more. Ben’s eyes shrink into slits and he’s about to go into a fully-fledged temper-tantrum. Callum can see it clearly.

“Okay, okay,” he relents, holding up his hands. He takes a couple deep breaths, wiping away his tears. He doesn’t want to anger Ben anymore than he’s already done. He turns to Ben and opens his arms.

“Come here,” Callum tells him. Ben shakes his head, not speaking.

“Please, I want to apologise.” Callum pulls out the puppy dog eyes; he knows Ben can’t resist those.

“Fine,” Ben says, rolls his eyes and goes to Callum. Callum hugs Ben tightly and not a moment later, he can feel Ben’s arms coming up around himself. He smiles into Ben’s shoulder and kisses the side of his head.

“You can drink as much coffee as you want,” Callum whispers into Ben’s ear. Ben wants to extricate himself from their hug but Callum holds on to him.

“But only if you promise not to make another love declaration to it. Those are for me only. Deal?” he asks.

“Deal,” Ben says and kisses Callum’s throat. They stand together like that for a few moments, kissing and hugging each other. Then Callum pulls away from their hug, takes Ben’s hand and pulls him towards the bedroom. Ben follows him happily, any thought of coffee forgotten.


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompts: “How can you drink that stuff?” + “God, I love your face.”

“How can you drink that stuff?” Callum asks, his face scrunched up. 

“My coffee?” Ben asks, confused. 

Callum nods. “It’s disgusting. I don’t like kissing you after you’ve had a drink of that,” Callum says, gesturing to Ben’s cup. 

“Since when?” Ben asks, barely able to contain his laughter. “You never said anything.” 

“Didn’t wanna scare you off, did I?” Callum shrugs.

“Babe, if your big oaf of a brother and his attack couldn’t scare me off, what makes you think your dislike of coffee would scare me off?” Ben asks, puts down his cup and goes to Callum. He puts his arms around his boyfriend’s hips and stares up at him. 

“Don’t remind me of that.” Callum's thumb brushes over Ben’s eyebrow, as if he's remembering Ben's bruised face from last July. Ben leans into the touch, closing his eyes. Savouring this quiet moment between them.

“I’m so sorry for what Stuart did. I-” 

“I don’t want to talk about that or your brother right now, Callum,” Ben interrupts him, opening his eyes again. “It happened and we both moved on. We’re good now, right?”

“But-” Callum wants to say something, but Ben is having none of it.

“Right?” he presses, forcing Callum to drop the subject. 

Callum sighs and nods. Ben doesn’t like seeing Callum this. He traces Callum’s lips with his thumb, trying to pull a smile out of him. And he succeeds. Callum’s smile transforms his face, radiating love. 

Ben could spend days, months, years watching Callum and it’d never be enough. To get himself out of his mushy thoughts, he leans up and kisses Callum, deepening the kiss and making Callum taste the coffee he’s just had. 

Callum kisses him willingly, moaning into Ben’s mouth. But when they break apart, Callum scrunches his face, making Ben laugh. 

“God, I love your face,” Ben says. 

“And I love you,” Callum answers. “Even when you taste like yucky coffee!” 

Ben buries his face in Callum's neck, still laughing.


	7. 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> prompt: "I wish I knew who they were…”

“Another one? Really, Callum?” Ben asks, startling Callum. 

“When did you get here?” Callum asks, blushing. He quickly folds a letter and puts it away. 

“I’ve been sitting here for a while, just waiting for you to stop your daydreaming,” Ben answers, grinning. 

“I wasn’t daydreaming,” Callum mumbles, unable to look at Ben.

“Oh? What was it you were doing then, please enlighten me.” 

Callum opens his mouth to reply but he doesn’t know what to say. Ben is right. Of course, he’d been daydreaming. His secret ‘admirer’ had left him another poem. This one read:

> Other men it is said have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough.” ― George Moore

He still blushes just thinking about it. He closes his eyes and sighs. 

“You’ve caught me,” he says, opening his eyes again and looking at Ben carefully.

Ben is smiling that soft smile Callum loves and not for the first time Callum wishes Ben was his secret admirer. They’d met years ago at uni and somehow never let go of each other since. They’re best friends. And Callum is in love with him.

“I wish I knew who they were,” Callum says and watches Ben’s reaction. Ben is the only one of his friends who’s never teased him about his secret admirer. It’s one of the reasons Callum thinks it might be Ben. 

Ben’s smile freezes and he looks down. Callum feels like he’s on to something. Maybe he just has to try. 

“Ben?” Callum asks, making Ben look up at him again.

“Why do you want to know who they are?” Ben asks, staring into Callum’s soul. 

“So I can tell them that I feel the same, of course,” Callum tells him, barely breathing.

Ben looks at him for a heartbeat, then another and finally nods.

“So, tell me,” he simply says and just waits. 

Callum is stunned, he doesn’t know what to do for a moment. He doesn’t know what he expected but it definitely wasn’t Ben telling him the truth so easily. 

“It _is_ you!” Callum exclaims.

“You knew?” 

“I’d suspected but...” Callum can’t have this conversation here. So he gets up and pulls Ben with him out of the cafe. He doesn’t go very far, just around the corner where it isn’t too crowded. He pushes Ben against the wall and just looks at him. Ben looks back at him, his face open and a small smile on his lips.

“I more or less had hoped it would be you,” Callum tells Ben quietly, sharing his own secret.

“Yeah?” Ben asks, his small smile turning big. Callum can only nod. He can’t stop looking at Ben’s lips.

“Can I kiss you?” he whispers, swallowing hard. 

“I thought you’d never ask,” Ben answers, putting his arms around Callum’s neck and pulling him down for their first kiss. 


	8. 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: “Please stop rolling your shirt sleeves up, it’s terribly distracting”

“Had I known you going straight meant you’d be wearing suits I would’ve thought twice about it before I said anything,” Callum says that morning, watching Ben get ready. 

“Wha? You have a problem with my suits?” Ben asks, his eyebrows raised. 

“Not really?” Callum says. “It’s more about the sight of you in them,” he admits, blushing. 

“You have a suit kink?” Ben perks up, a grin making its way onto his face. “Why, babe, what else don’t I know about you?” 

Callum turns away, blushing a deeper red and leaves the room, Ben’s laughter following him. 

~*~~*~ 

Callum is putting the final touches to his pasta dish, waiting for Ben to arrive for their lunch date. They’d agreed to take the rest of the afternoon off to spend with each other, not having had a lot of time together these past few weeks. 

“Babe, that smells delicious!” Ben says, coming in. He hugs Callum from behind and gives him a soft kiss on the cheek. Callum turns his head into the kiss and smiles at his boyfriend. 

“I’ll be done in a second, go get washed up!” 

“Yes sir!” Ben salutes, grinning at Callum. Callum shakes his head and watches him go. He turns off the cooker, dishes up and sits down, waiting for Ben.

Ben comes out of the bathroom, having removed his jacket, rolling up his sleeve. Callum freezes for a moment, not able to look away from Ben’s arm. The white shirt accentuates everything about him, making Callum swallow tightly. 

Callum had ignored his attraction for men for such a long time that now it feels like everything about Ben is a turn-on. He takes a big gulp from his glass, needing to distract himself from his boyfriend. 

Ben waits for him to put down his glass and leans down to kiss him on the lips. 

“Hi,” he whispers, smiling at Callum softly. “You okay? You look flushed.” 

“Nah, I’m fine. All good,” Callum answers, looking away from Ben. “Let’s eat, before everything gets cold.” 

Ben looks at him for a heartbeat and then sits down. But Callum’s relief doesn’t last long because Ben turns his attention to his other sleeve and starts rolling it up. And again, Callum can’t look away. He watches Ben’s nimble fingers work his shirtsleeve and how with every turn it exposes more of Ben’s arm. Callum’s mouth goes dry and his trousers feel tighter all of a sudden. 

“Callum?” Ben asks and Callum snaps his eyes to Ben’s. He knows he looks like a deer caught in headlights but he can’t help it.

“Is something the matter?” 

Callum is grappling for an answer, something that doesn’t make him sound like a sex-crazy freak but there is nothing, his mind is wiped clean. He settles for saying: “Please stop rolling your shirt sleeves up, it’s terribly distracting,” his voice desperate, even to his own ears. 

“Distracting, you say?” Ben asks and he sounds curious, deceivingly so. Callum narrows his eyes and finally sees the little smirk on Ben’s lips.

“You were doing it on purpose!” Callum accuses and the way Ben’s grin grows bigger tells Callum all he needs to know. 

“I knew it! And here I was, thinking-” Callum stops himself from saying anything else.

“Thinking what?” 

“I don’t know.” Callum deflates, shrugging. “I thought I was a freak or something, because the sight of your arms.. I don’t know, it was turning me on.” Callum mumbles the last bit, hoping Ben won’t press. 

“What was that?” 

“It turns me on,” Callum admits, looking everywhere but at Ben. 

“Finally!” Ben says heatedly, making Callum look at him after all. “You rarely speak about things that turn you on.” Callum furrows his brows, not understanding what Ben is saying.

“Callum, we’ve been dating for a while now and we’ve had loads of sex. I know you like me and I know you enjoy the things we do in bed together. Or any other surface that we can find.” He winks at Callum. “But babe, you never tell me what turns you on. What your kinks are. What you like doing in bed.”

“I like everything we do!” Callum admits, blushing a deep red. 

“Do you, though? Sometimes I feel like I’m forcing my kinks on you and…”

“No, Ben, no!” Callum shakes his head vehemently, reaching for Ben’s hand on the table. He takes a deep breath before he continues. “You’re my first boyfriend, Ben. The first man I slept with. To be honest, I consider you my first in everything.” Ben wants to protest but Callum just goes on. 

“No, you are. What I had with Whitney, it wasn’t real. I just went through the motions with her, not thinking too much or I wouldn’t have been able to sleep with her. But with you, Ben, everything feels right, exciting. Seeing you in a suit turns me on. Your rolled up sleeves? Nothing more sexy. Everything we do is thrilling. You told me to enjoy myself and I am. And that’s thanks to you!” 

“But you never say what you like.” Ben’s ears are red, they look endearing.

“It’s because I don’t actually know what I like, apart from what we do,” Callum shrugs.

“How do you not know? Did you never watch porn? Took sneaky looks in dirty mags?” Ben asks, as if it’s the most natural thing. 

“Not really?” Callum shrugs again. “I completely ignored that part of myself. I was afraid that my dad or my brother would know just looking at my face. I was so afraid to be outed that I just blanked it out.” 

“Oh babe!” Ben smiles at Callum, squeezing his hand. And then he gets that gleam in his eyes that tells Callum the next thing out of his mouth will be something outrageous. 

“How about I find us a couple films to watch. And maybe a book or two, so you can have a look and see if you wanna try something.” He grins at Callum. 

Callum wants to say no but stops to study Ben’s face for a moment. He’s not sure why he’s protesting so much. He’s out, everybody knows he’s gay. And he’s dating Ben. What harm will it do to look at a book with his boyfriend? 

“Okay,” Callum relents.

“Yes!!!” Ben exclaims. He takes up his phone and starts tapping away at it, making Callum smile.

Just seeing Ben this excited makes Callum happy but he also knows that Ben wouldn’t make him do something he doesn’t want to. He trusts Ben completely, with his body and with his heart. 


	9. 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: "Are you sick of me yet?"

Ben wakes up slowly to the sound of humming. He’s surrounded by warmth, hidden under his thin blanket that he’s pulled up to his nose. He opens one eye carefully and tires to see what’s going on. He finds himself cuddled up to Callum, who’s sitting up in bed slightly, a book in hand. Callum is wearing headphones and humming to whatever he’s listening to. Ben can’t help the smile that steals itself onto his face. He opens his other eye and observes Callum. 

Callum’s hair is tousled from sleep and he’s in desperate need of a shave. Though Ben wouldn’t mind if Callum kept it, he remembers the delicious beard burn Callum had given him a couple weeks ago. Just thinking about it makes him shiver. 

Ben loves Callum’s face, he could spend hours watching it and it wouldn’t be enough. He cuddles closer to Callum, trying to tangle their legs. This makes Callum jump slightly, making Ben grin. Callum turns to him, his surprise turning to pleasure. 

“Morning, sleepyhead.” Callum leans down to Ben and gives him a soft kiss on the lips. “Have you been up long?” 

“Nah, just woke up. But I need more cuddles!” he fake pouts, making Callum laugh. 

“Your wish is my command,” Callum tells him and puts away his book and headphones and pulling Ben into him. Ben buries himself into Callum’s side and sighs contently. 

“Are you sick of me yet?” he asks quietly, not for the first time wondering if living with Ben and his family at the Mitchell house is not too much for Callum. He’s barely able to go out because of Phil’s health restrictions. 

“Never,” Callum says and he sounds so sincere. But Ben has to ask one more time.

“Are you sure? You were in the middle of your police training and you had to shelve that because we wanted to be together for lockdown. I don't want you to resent me for disrupting your career prospects.” Ben trails off, glad he can hide his face from Callum. But apparently not for long, because Callum detangles himself from Ben and sits up, forcing Ben to do the same. 

“You know, that night in the park?” Callum asks. Ben is not sure where Callum is going with this, but he nods for him to go on. “I told you back then that I was lonely. Even though I had a girlfriend and everything I could wish for, I was so lonely. Having this secret and not being able to trust anyone with it, it was isolating me. It was slowly killing me and I didn’t even realise.” He stops and takes Ben’s hands into his. 

“But then I met you and you challenged everything I thought I wanted out of life. And as hard as it was to come out to my dad and everyone else, this-” he gestures between Ben and himself, “is worth all the pain I went through. You know the real me, my brother and my friends know the real me. I’m not lonely anymore. And I’d rather be in lockdown with you than go out and train to be a copper any day.” Ben knows he’s smiling like a soppy git, but he can’t help it. 

“I love you!” Ben tells Callum, needing needing him to know.

“I know. And I love you!” Callum pulls Ben into his arms and hugs him tightly. He kisses Ben's hair and they stay like that for a while. This is happiness, Ben thinks and closes his eyes. 


	10. 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> prompt: Foreheads pressed together, breath intertwining, slow, content affection

After his first week as a fully fledged copper Callum comes home tense, barely speaking a word to Ben. He just takes off his jacket and sits down on the sofa, staring at the telly without seeing anything.

Ben tires to make him talk but he soon realises there is no getting through to Callum and he doesn’t wanna make things worse. He quietly draws Callum a bath and had pulls him into the bathroom. Callum blinks down at Ben, as if he is slowly waking up from a dream.

“What’s going on?” he asks and looks around himself.

“I wanted you to relax before we eat. Have a bath while I cook something.”

Callum looks at him for a moment before nodding and pulling his clothes off. Ben lingers a moments, watching Callum before he leaves him to it and goes to the kitchen to make pasta. He wants to make something that doesn’t take ages to prepare, so that they can go to bed early. 

Ben is nearly done with their food, when two arms circle his waist and Callum kisses his neck. Ben smiles and turns his head to give Callum more room. He's glad that his boyfriend seems to finally have relaxed a little bit.

“Gimme a minute and we can eat,” he says and hums.

“Hmmm, I have a better idea,” Callum murmurs and pulls Ben away from the counter, all the while kissing and sucking Ben’s neck.

Ben turns in Callum’s arms and puts his own around Callum’s neck and kisses him fiercely. Callum responds with a loud groan and he pulls Ben into their bedroom.

Callum pushes at Ben’s clothes frantically, wanting to feel Ben’s skin under his fingers.

“Cal, Cal, wait!” Ben stops him. Callum’s pupils are dilated and he’s panting. “Take off your clothes,” Ben tells him while doing the same. This isn’t the night for a slow foreplay.

Once naked, Ben gets on the bed and pulls Callum with him. Callum is shaking and Ben knows there is only one thing that will tire Callum out and make him stop thinking for a while.

He reverses their positions, kisses Callum on the lips and reaches for their bedside drawer. He finds the lube and condoms and gets to work to preparing himself. Callum reaches for Ben but Ben holds up his unoccupied had, stopping him. 

“No,” he pants. “You’re just gonna-gonna lie down and let me do all the work!” Ben doesn’t wanna lose too much time, he hastily stretches himself, not wanting to make Callum wait. Callum is watching him with big eyes, his hands closing and opening at his sides, barely holding his body in check. When Ben feels like he’s tortured Callum enough, he pulls out his fingers and puts on the condom on Callum, making him moan again. 

“Callum, look at me! Don’t close your eyes,” Ben instructs, holds Callum’s dick in place and oh so slowly sinks down on it, all the while trying not to close his own eyes. He wants Callum to see how me makes Ben feels. He wants to fill Callum’s world with nothing else but them, so Callum can let go of this past week. 

“God,” Ben moans, his eyelashes flattering when he finally bottoms out. “Feeling you like this never gets old.”

“Tell me about it,” Callum says, his voice tight. “Can I touch you now?” 

Ben just nods and Callum sits up, making Ben sink just that little bit deeper, making them both groan. Callum puts his hands around Ben, his big hands splayed on Ben’s back. 

After what feels like an eternity but is only a moment, Ben heaves himself up and sits back down. He tries to go slow at first but he knows that Callum needs more. And so does he.

“Wanna-wanna help me out a bit?” he pants, grinning. 

“Gladly!” Callum tells him and in a quick and fluid move has Ben on his back, without ever pulling out of him. 

“I love it when you take control like this!” Ben laughs out loud. “Come on, show me what you got, big boy!” 

Callum doesn’t need to be told twice. 

~*~*~

Foreheads pressed together, their breaths intertwining, Ben and Callum are slowly coming down from their intense love-making. Once Callum had taken control, his movements had been fast and harsh and Ben had loved every moment of it. Ben is the only one who gets to see this side of Callum.

Callum had once confessed to him that he’d been afraid to lose control with Whitney. He’d always been hesitant and careful when they’d slept together, not wanting to hurt her. But that he’d dreamt about letting lose and just enjoying himself. He’d asked Ben if they could try that one day. Ben had just looked at him, his heart growing too big for his chest. 

“We can try whatever you want, Cal,” he’d said, kissing Callum slowly. Knowing Callum trusted him enough to ask for this, Ben had been overwhelmed. 

“Thank you,” Callum whispers into Ben’s lips, kissing him slowly, chastely. They’re lying close, their naked bodies nearly overheated. But Callum needs to touch Ben, needs to reassure himself that he didn’t hurt Ben and Ben lets him. It’s their own little ritual whenever Callum needs hard sex. After that first time, Callum had asked over and over again if he’d hurt Ben and if he was alright. Now he reassures himself with his hands, watches Ben’s reaction to every little touch. 

Ben loves this side of Callum, the loving and caring side. The side everyone gets to see. But he also loves the assertive and demanding side of Callum, the side only Ben gets to see. The side that’s hidden beneath the nice and helpful Callum. He’s grateful to the universe that he got the full package with Callum. 

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos are appreciated. also, feel free to send me prompts [here](https://yasisworld.tumblr.com/ask). i'm just a little slow filling them.


End file.
